Nine Cuts Collection

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Home > Fun Stuff > Nine Cuts
[posted 21 Jul 2002; updated 16 Jun 2007]

I started collecting Nine Cuts in 1997. I think the accumulated bad press he got made me think I might be able to collect a statistically significant percentage of all Nine Cuts cards ever printed, and that would be cool somehow. Looking back, I'm not sure what I was thinking :) At first I just collected them. Then, I started making people sign them when they gave me the card. Then I started asking people to mark up the card, change Mr. Cuts however they wanted, just so he was playable, or funny, or both. I even asked for people to trade me Nine Cuts on the public trading list, and got several that way. The appeal of marked-up Nines has faded since Z-Man published the upgraded promo Nine Cuts - I've had a four year dry spell...

Here's a selection of some of the Cuts I've gotten, with their new abilities. The sad part is that when I moved I lost the piece of paper where I kept everybody's name (since some of these signatures aren't exactly readable) so there is an orphan Cuts shown here. If it's yours, please remind me!

I'm always looking for more Cuts, so if you'd like to contribute please email me. I'll send you a self-addressed, stamped envelope, or some international reply coupons if you're outside the US. I generally don't trade anything for Nine, because, let's face it, he's the poster child for a coaster card, but it's always nice when Nine gets a free ride because we're trading something else anyway - feel free to send me your want list and maybe we can swap some playable cards too :)

Nine Cuts art is ©1995 by Richard Thomas. Many many thanks to Rich for giving his permission to post the card.

Click the thumbnail of the card to see a larger version in a new window. Sorry, nothing so exciting as a slide show.

Buro Cuts from Mike Nickoloff

Mike Nickoloff, 1997

Buro Cuts, Mercenary Assassin
Fighting 4
Cost 4
Unique. Assassinate. Ambush.

Mike's was one of the first of the marked-up Nine Cuts to come my way. It might actually be playable like this :)

Nine Cuts from Frank Bustamante

Frank Bustamante, 1997

Unique. Assassinate. Toughness: 2. +4 damage vs. Cops.

Frank's was a step in the right direction, but he forgot to markup the cost and/or Fighting. Or at least make him a Hood :)

Nine Cuts event from Tim McCann

Tim McCann, 1998

Nine Cuts, Mercenary Assassin Event
Cost 9
Unique. Smoke 9 target characters. Only one Nine Cuts may be played per game.

A very expensive Bomb that doesn't get the Gunman. But I gotta say that if the original Nine Cuts had been an event, this would be him, and it would be rare too :)

Nine Cuts from Ben Barnett

Ben Barnett, 1997

Unique. Assassinate. 9 Cuts returns to your hand when smoked. You may do 2 points of damage to any target when you play 9 Cuts.

Ben's Cuts came through the mail in a trade, the first I got that way. Very cool. Ben published the Kii-Yaaah! newsletter for Z-Man Games.

Nine Cats from Tony Hafner

Tony Hafner, 1997

Nine Cats, Mercenary Cats
Fighting 12
Cost 4
Cannot intercept. Flip a coin when attacking. Heads: Nine Cats is smoked.
We don't discriminate. We'll whack any target, accept any cat food!

Go ahead, count the cats. Mike brought this back from Tony for me from some WotC thing he did in Washington.

Nine Cuts #2, from Tony Hafner

added 23 Aug 2002

Tony Hafner, 1997

Grove of Cuts, Feng Shui Assassin
Unique. Assassinate. All you sites you control gain the abilities of a Grove of Willows.

I like the idea of a smallish character that gives some boost to your sites. Maybe not this ability, but something...

Nine Cuts from unknown #1

added 23 Aug 2002

Here's one I can't read, and where I'd really like to have my missing notes. Is this yours? Let me know! 1997 or 1998, I think.

Cost 4
Unique. Assassinate. Whenever Nine Cuts smokes a character, put 3 damage on any feng shui site.

Not a bad boost, but not quite enough, since I still wouldn't play him this way. He needs to be 4/4, at least.

Nine Cuts from Lissanne Lake. Art copyright 2002 by Lissanne Lake, all rights reserved. Used with permission.

added 4 Sep 2002

Lissanne Lake did this awesome Nine Cuts as part of a trade with me in 2002.

Nine Cuts, Monkeyboy Assassin Director
Unique. Assassinate Scene. Turn to toast all characters in a combat. Then toast this card.
"You're all fired! I quit!"

Bummer for all those Golden Gunman, Golden Comeback junkies :)

Nine Cuts #1 from Jan Malina, Nov.2002

added 15 Nov 2002

Jan Malina, multiple-time The Man (Shadowfist World Champion in dueling and multiplayer), sent me these two cool Nine Cuts in Nov. 2002.

Nine Cute Chicks, Mercenary Assassins
Fighting 4
Unique. Assassinate. Takes no damage from Unique Characters.
"Only mooks don't fall for them."

Jan told me that he should've made the Fighting 5.

Nine Cuts #2 from Jan Malina, Nov.2002

added 15 Nov 2002

The second Nine Cuts from Jan Malina.

Fighting 4
Unique. Assassinate. When he smokes a character you may smoke another character controlled by the same player.
"He knows the weak link."

I like this take on the deadly assassin theme - anybody with a foundation and a hitter on the table would be trying to take Nine out before he attacked the little guy :)

Nine Cuts from Ryan Vazquez, Jan 2003

added 5 Feb 2003

This Nine Cuts came in from Ryan Vázquez after I made him a trade offer. He had already made a deal with someone else, but he sent the Nine Cuts anyway - thanks Ryan!

If you damage the target of your attack, inflict 9 damage, divided how you choose, on characters.

Another good incarnation that will have people scrambling to take him out before he whacks some little guy...

Nine Cuts from Jim Sensenbrenner

added 29 Jan 2007

Jim Sensenbrenner sent me this Nine Cuts as part of a trade deal in 2007, breaking a four year Cutless dry spell. Thanks Jim!

Fighting 9
Unique. Assassinate. -3 damage to Sites. At the start of an opponent's Main Shot, he may pay you 2 Power to take control of Nine Cuts.

I like this idea because it fits his tag line perfectly, but the low take control cost makes him a risky play.

Nine Cuts from Jacob Skytte

added 16 Jun 2007

Jacob Skytte sent me this Nine Cuts as part of a trade deal in 2007. Thanks Jacob!

Fighting 12
Self-Mutilating Assassin

Unique. Assassinate. When Nine Cuts enters play, inflict 9 damage on him.

The literal interpretation of his title goes well with Sacred Heart Hospital.

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